The following is a parody of my favorite Dr. Seuss book, describing my hesitancy to use my cane, before trying it but then my relieved delight when I realize it’s actually pretty helpful to have around!
I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
Would you use it at a park?
Could you use it in the dark?
I could not, would not at a park.
I could not, would not, in the dark. I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
Would you, could you beside a brick wall?
Or could you use it to prevent a fall?
I would not, could not beside a brick wall, nor to prevent a fall. I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
How about with some bling?
Or near a strange red thing?
I would not, could not with some bling or near a strange red thing. I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
How about in a coffee shop?
Or at a roadside rest stop?
Or maybe in the rest stop’s gift shop?
I would not carry it into a coffee shop or use it at a rest stop, nor in a gift shop. I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
What about as a limbo stick?
Or maybe to do a sword trick?
How about in a crowded theme park line?
Or to avoid tripping over the wet floor sign?
I would not use it as a limbo stick or to do a sword trick. Nor in a park line or to avoid the wet floor sign. I do not need it; I’m just fine! I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
How about with a head of curls?
What about walking while with your girls?
I could not, would not with a head of curls. I will not, will not while with my girls. I do not like white cane in hand. I do not like it, Joy I am!
You do not like it, so you say! Try it! Try it and you may, I say!
…Say!
I like white cane in hand!
I do!
I like it, Joy I am!
And I would bring it to a park, and I will use it in the dark. I do so like white cane in hand. I do so like it, Joy I am!
And I will use it beside a brick wall, and I will bring it to prevent a fall.
And I would carry it with some bling, and even near a strange red thing. I do so like white cane in hand. I do so like it, Joy I am!
And I could bring it to a coffee shop, and to a roadside rest stop and into a gift shop.
And I would use it as a limbo stick, and to do a sword trick.
I would bring it to a crowded theme park line, and I would use it to avoid a wet floor sign. I do so like white cane in hand. I do so like it, Joy I am!
And I would use it with a head of curls, and I would most definitely use it while with my girls.
And I will use it here and there and I will use it anywhere. I do so like white cane in hand, I do so like it, Joy I am!
Wow, Joy Your parody writing skills are awesome! I am sure that Dr. Seuss is as pleased with your work as you are proud of yourself. Pride is a good thing.Thanks for the clever illustrations. Hugs. Kevin Kuhn
Love the parody on carrying the white cane. I just started using a cane in public and the parody is a true reflection of mum thoughts and emotions during this time. Love the humor and insight. Thanks for sharing your talent!
What an encouraging and inspiring poem for those like me who have yet to use a cane! Thank you for sharing it!
Thanks Pam, I may come up with a more refined version on white cane day!
The Cat in The Hat will, now, not go splat. Clever parody. Happy for you for changing your mind!
Thanks Rita!
OMG!! This is hilariously clever and funny!! You never cease to amaze me. I am praying for all endeavors in CA!
Rita, what a great addition to the parody!
What a fantastic post! I laughed out loud! Every cane user can relate to these feelings—and it’s amazing how often our cane debates can sound like this narrator!
I’m excited to read more from you!
Ha! You’re right about the cane debates!
This is so adorable. Green eggs and ham is one of my daughters favorite books, and she is very hesitant about using her cane. I will definitely be reading this rendition to her tomorrow.
Super, I hope it helps her to feel more comfortable, or at the very least, give her a few good laughs! Let me know how she likes it!
This is Brilliant!!! My son looks undressed unless his cane is in his hand, and we use it for loads of other things too. Shared with Common Sense (our UK charity). Can’t wait to read it to Lucas (now 13).
Thanks Sarah! I hope Lucas likes it! Let me know the other uses you guys use it for!
Really funny and very on point, Joy! what a great way to relieve the stress of dealing with the assumptions of the fully-sighted world. This is awesome!
Thanks Julia! 🙂
I love this. Tells my own story to a tee! I love my white wand now I’ve finally let it into my life!
Ha, white wand, I like it….I’ll add it to the illustrated version! lol! “Would you, could you as a wand? Would you, could you near a pond?”
Looking Forward To The Book!
Very amused. Great job, Joy.
I have to catch up on the last few weeks of the doublevision posts. I didn’t realize the blog wasn’t popping up in my feed automatically. Oops!