Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance” pulses through the speakers, and the vibrations reverberate across our chairs, drawing each audience member into the moment. “She’s flipping across the stage,” my husband leans over, whispering. My heart beats faster and I realize I am holding my breath.
“Now she’s doing flips and kind of bounces into a group of dancers who push her back, and then… um… she keeps dancing.”
Huh? That last description kinda of confuses me, but I have some interesting images in my mind. It is Nationals in Seaside, Oregon, and the competitors are fierce. I’m on the edge of my seat. I strain my neck to see, to catch a glimpse of my daughter, Lucy. I have the vague conception of where she is at based on my husband’s descriptions, but each time he tells me she is front and center, it’s as if a flash of color darts across the stage, and the moment is over before Lucy materializes into anything my retinas can recognize.
“She’s leaping and doing aerials across the stage,” he continues, his voice a mixture of awe and euphoria. Tears spring to my eyes. Tears of joy that my daughter has found an art she both excels at and loves. Tears of gratitude that I can be here to witness it. Tears of pain because I want to see it. To really see it, not just listen to a few whispered movements after they’ve already occurred. I want to know why the audience is cheering at certain moments. Moreover, I want to cheer alongside them
I want details that my spouse, having no dance background, cannot possibly find words to describe, much less whisper loudly into my ear amid blaring base at a pace even a speedy auctioneer could not match, especially while trying to take in and enjoy his daughter’s performance himself.
I lean forward intently, as if doing so will somehow convince my retinas to give me the images I desire. It doesn’t.
I want to know what shape her form is taking exactly as the music rises and falls. I want to know the details of each costume and whether her hair is pinned in a low bun, braided or flowing freely. Most of all, I want to see the facial expressions the other parents keep raving about every time they see me.
“I just LOVE watching Lucy,” they say, “her face is so expressive.” I find myself feeling jealous of these other parents. It feels as if they all have a front row seat, and I’m stuck in the back behind some dude wearing a top hat. It doesn’t seem fair. Shouldn’t I get to glimpse my firstborn in her joyful, expressive art?
As the last beats fade and the dancers exit the stage, I have the urge to call after them “Come back, I missed a few parts!”
Fast forward six months to January, and I’m listening to my friend, who I’ll call “Accessible Annie” for reasons that will soon become apparent, describe a live musical she has just watched with audio descriptions. For those readers who may not be familiar with audio descriptions, they basically describe everything that is taking place in a show or movie in real time. I first watched and posted about a movie theater experience watching “Paddington” back in 2015, as it felt like a game changer. It was somewhat new technology at that point, but now I very rarely watch anything without turning on audio descriptions. Most Netflix shows and movies have it as an option, and my family immediately turns it on when we sit down to watch something together, sometimes even when I’m not there just out of habit. Plus, my husband says he sometimes hears details of facial expressions and actions he at first missed even though he is fully sighted.
I discuss this with Accessible Annie and lament how I wish there was a way to have someone describe my daughter’s dances at competitions.
“I know someone who might be able to help,” Annie says. Of course she does. Annie is one of the most proactive, well-researched activists I know. When both Delta and Southwest Airlines began requiring service dog forms that were not accessible, she immediately file complaints (compared with me, who just complained in my head but did nothing!) When a hotel gave her and several other guide dog handlers inaccessible forms with ridiculous cleaning fees listed for handlers who leave their guides in the hotel room, she acquired support from a law professor and his students to challenge the hotel. Typically, she has found a way to hold companies to higher accessibility standards, though it has taken a lot of her time and effort, and not all battles have ended resolutely. The traveling Immersive Van Gogh Exhibit, for example, never followed through with implementing audio descriptions or even any tweaks to make the exhibit accessible. Overall, her efforts have paid off, especially her joint efforts in a lawsuit that resulted in accessible mail-in ballots where she resides in Florida.
It’s interesting that my first instinct is not to bother trying to make things accessible. I’m not sure if it’s because I worry the outcome won’t be worth the effort or whether I don’t want to inconvenience someone. My inner critic chalks it up to laziness though my compassionate self gently reminds me that I am juggling a lot at this stage in my life so I’m just a bit tired.
Sometimes it’s precisely our exhaustion with a circumstance that gives us the energy to do something about it. So when Annie gave me the contact info for Chanelle Carson, who audio describes for live productions in Las Vegas like Cirque du Soleil and other touring shows, I reached out to her right away. I was nervous my project would seem too small for her or whether it would be too expensive for me to afford. When she came back with a very generous offer that I could afford, I finally let myself get excited about the prospect.
Fast forward once again, this time to President’s Day Weekend, just one week ago in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho, and I am fidgeting nervously with my AirPods as the act prior to Lucy’s exits the stage. I need to hit the play button at precisely the right moment, and I’m nervous I’ll miss it, so I hand my husband my phone and say “press play the second you see Lucy coming onto the stage.” A few seconds later, they are announcing Lucy’s solo act, and simultaneously Chanelle’s voice sounds in my ears, welcoming Lucy to the stage. I am immediately immersed in the dance via Chanelle’s real-time descriptions. When I watched Lucy in the past, I did catch glimpses of her movements if she happened to move directly into the 4-degree straw through which I see, but only when the light happened to catch both Lucy’s form and the attention of my retina simultaneously, so possibly one or two moments during the performance. But here, now, watching her dance with audio descriptions, it’s as if each glimpse is strung together into moments my brain can comprehend. It’s not just the technicality of the movements, however, it’s the meaning conveyed in the descriptions. The tone of the descriptions matches the tone of the movements, and I hear the story the dance is narrating. “Crushing, as if being hit in the stomach, she brings one leg back, leaps in the air, and makes her way to the right side of the stage.”
In Chanelle’s email with the recording, she has sent detailed descriptions of each routine’s costumes, so I know have a mental image of this as I listen to the descriptions.
When I hear her describe a particularly challenging move, I know exactly why those around me are cheering, and I join them, only unbeknownst to them, I am cheering for multiple reasons. “Yes, go Lucy!” And YES, go accessibility! It is worth the effort. To engage with art. To engage with life. To feel and be connected to the world around you. Accessible moments matter.
(Note: I’ve posted a video below of Lucy’s solo dance with audio descriptions. by Chanelle Carson. Lucy is earring a nude leotard, her hair is in a low bun and there is a faded, painted red hand print on her right leg. She is dancing to “Your Power” by Billie Eilish)
Joy, thanks for sharing this. I cried reading your story at your pain and joy. I’m so happy for you that you found Chanelle’s audio descriptions. What an amazing description! Lucy is an incredible dancer, it was so wonderful to be able to watch (and listen to!) her performance! ~Kierstyn
Thank you so much for diving into this experience and feeling it with me! The work you do for your patience with accessibility really does make a difference!🥹💗💗
Joy, thanks…wow…yes to feel and be connected to the world around you!
Hugs and love,
Kevin Kuhn
Thanks Kevin! Absolutely connection is so important!✌🏼🥰
Both Lucy’s dance and your written description your desire to experience it are beautiful! Great job momma! Thanks for sharing this with all of us. I love you big time!❤️🥰
Awww thank you so much for these words
💗🙌💗
Joy,
You are a rockstar with words just as Lucy with dance! Thank you for sharing this part of your journey!
Love,
Bev
Aw thanks so much Bev
💗🙌🙏
Joy – There are so many levels of art here: your moving and vivid writing, Lucy’s graceful dance, and Chanelle’s detailed descriptions. They all seem woven into their own beautiful work of art. Thanks so much for sharing!
Oh wow, I love the way that you framed that! Thank you so much! 💗💗💗
I so agree with Pat. So many levels of beautiful, delicious, nuanced artistry. I’m a music friend of Ben’s. Touched to “meet” you and Lucy here. Thanks for sharing. It touched something deep inside me. I’m not even sure what that is. The desire to be seen? The sadness at places I’m blind, too? Not sure, but thank you. I hope I’ll meet your whole family in person some day. Blessings! David
Thank you David! That means so much and I hope we all get to meet in person some day as well!
Joy, this is amazing! Thank you for sharing. Definitely go Lucy!
Thanks so much, Rebecca!🥳🙏
Love this Joy! What a blessing your daughter has found a creative outlet for her gift!! What an amazing story of the technology that’s available for the visually impaired! 💙
Thank you, Becky! It must be strange for you to see her so grown-up after all those times been brought her as a baby to the office!💗💗💗
Yes! I can see accessible moments matter – pardon the pun lol:) Truly game- changing! Much like audible for book lovers this should, and eventually will be! readily available to all because how can it not be? Once discovered you can’t stop progress:) Good for you seeking it out and spreading the word! PS) Lucy’s solo is beautiful and even enhanced but the audio descriptions!
Thanks so much Kristin. I hope so. I think you’re right that it will be readily available!
Yes! accessible moments do matter:) Audio describing, what a wonderful service! Much like audible for book lovers – good for you for reaching out and making it happen for yourself and then spreading the word! PS) Lucy’s solo is beautiful and enhanced by the audio description I think!
Thanks, Kristin! As a fellow dance, mom, you definitely know the importance of watching, and connecting with our daughters performances! 🙂
Joy, so beautifully written and a wonderful message! I was right there with you as you led me through the whole process and evolution of providing an accessible experience. Great job! And I’m so happy you were able to be there in real time and experience your daughter’s experience! Yay!
Thanks so much, Keith! Your words mean a lot!
Joy this is Awesome, Thank you for describing how you are feeling and what you are seeing is such detail. And the struggles you go through daily. Lucy is a wonderful dancer, you and Ben must be so proud of her. Congratulations!
Thank you Kim! Yes we are! 😉
Oh Joy!!
This is beautiful on so many levels. A greater understanding of how hard this must be for you, a gift of someone who can describe the movement so beautifully and the amazing talent of Lucy. This was absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you Tammy! Miss you!
Oh Joy – This means so much. Thank you for sharing these moments with us and helping me understand the depth and breadth of what accessibility can be. Beautiful. And who is this incredible daughter of yours???
Hayley, I know! Time has gone SO FAST. I’m sure your kids are looking so much more grown up these days as well. We miss you guys!
You have SO much talent in your family, and in your community, Joy! Thank you, as always, for sharing your journey and reminding us all what truly matters. Much love!!
Thanks so much Audrey! Love you!
Dear Joy,
Thank you for sharing your beautiful path of accessibility, the beauty of Lucy’s dancing, and the remarkable and wonderful descriptions by Chanelle.
Your words offer many gifts. They enhance awareness that my bodily senses are ultimately supported by what lives in my heart. Feeling and being connected to the world begin with an open heart…begin with love…and accessibility, in all of its glory and forms, flows from there.
Peace and hugs and love,
Al
Thank you, Al! These insights brought the conversation to another level and worded so elegantly! Thank you for connecting with the feelings behind my words, and offering your own!
Go Lucy! Go Joy! Accessible moments absolutely matter – thank you for sharing your experiences with all of us!
Thank you! Sharing our stories has been healing for us so we will continue to do it in the fringe benefit is that it helps others as well!
Thank you for sharing this! I’m excited to know that such a service exists. We have three children (12, 9, and 6) and my husband and I are both blind, so we can really relate to this. Our kids have been involved in Ballet, baseball/softball, musical performances, competitive swim, etc. all of which are pretty hard to follow as a blind person w/o discription. Most of the time we muddle through with commentating by one of our children, or discriptions from another parent, but something like this would be helpful too. We’ve talked before about hiring a “reader” for certain events just to bring our own describer. Anyway, I’m glad to know that someone actually does this for a living. I also thought I’d share two other solutions we’ve found helpful w/o hiring a describer which we’ve been using for some of our kids sport activities:
Game Changer: this is an app that gives you realtime computer generated descriptions of the game. the key is that your child’s team (or opposing team) has to have someone entering the plays, but a lot of teams are doing this because they can track/log players’ stats easily too, and then family members who cannot be in-person can still follow the game. The app will describe it very much like a commentator too and has background noise to give the impression of a crowd. 🙂 Our daughter has been playing rec and travel competitive softball for three years now and we’ve been able to find her games almost each time. I would imagine other sports are on here too, but we’ve only used it for softball so far. It’s pretty fast too, though still not exactly real-time, but great as a blind person so you don’t have to ask your neighbor “what just happened?”
2. Team unify: My son has been swimming competitively and this is the app they use to track all the meets, times, schedules, etc. It’s used all over b/c I’ve seen times and results from kids from other states. The meets usually take place at a high school or university pool, so they have electronic touch pads in the pools, and the timers at the events will enter the times from each heat instantly into the system which connects with the app. It’s not giving you a description, and isn’t quite “real time” but not too long depending on if your timers (human) are good. 🙂 but you can get the results for each heat pretty soon after each race.
Anyway, hope this might be helpful for someone else. Thanks for your post.
Thanks Mary Joe! What great tips about the apps! Yes, I think there are probably readers out there who would really benefit from that and I will definitely tell my sister as her kids do a lot of sports!
Thank you so much.
I think it is great to be with you on a audio description of you daughters dance trials.
I have grandkids that are in a lot of sports and equine events and have wanted to see some of it. My wife does what she can but she didn’t growup around horses are the sports the kids are in.
It made my hart glad just to your post.
Thanks Jeff