Will the Real Blind Person Look at Me? (guest post)

I met Amy via an online Retinitis Pigmentosa support group, and we instantly connected.  Reading this post, I think you’ll see why!  She writes an awesome blog and has a memoir that I’m looking forward to reading.  This is one of my favorite posts because it discusses the spectrum of blindness and how many people with vision loss do not appear so.

 

By Amy L. Bovaird

Real-Blind-Person-1024x1024Look at the picture. Who would you guess the blind one is?

You might think it’s the second photo because there is a little part of a cane sticking up. The truth is … each one of us in the photo is blind.

Blindness can’t be measured on a set of scales with a needle, one pointing to BLIND and the other SIGHTED. Yet, it’s often believed that it’s like that. Either you can see or you can’t. So when onlookers see an individual using a white cane, many times the thought that accompanies it is, “that person can’t see anything.”

But then the same blind person looks at a watch, checks messages on a cell phone, looks both ways when crossing the street, makes eye contact with the onlooker, orders off a table menu, walks around a number of barriers while dragging the cane behind, or simply smiles at him or herself in a mirror.

You can see! You’re faking it. You just want attention. You must want a free bus pass. You’re playing tricks. Snea-ky!  Hey, look this way. And the most famous response is … But you don’t LOOK blind!

People have often voiced these thoughts aloud to me – much later, of course when they can laugh at their misconceptions. Sometimes strangers even voice these thoughts out loud. While it might seem strange, some vision-impaired people may unconsciously follow these same fallacies. I don’t look blind. AM I faking it? Are people going to think I am? I struggled with it certainly. That’s one reason it is so hard to pick up a cane and use it.

Those who are not familiar with blindness often have a certain idea in their minds of what a blind person looks like. When I ask them what that is, their response might be, “Someone with thick glasses.”  The answers vary; sometimes silence follows.

The truth is, you can’t tell if someone is blind by looking.

I’ve had people try to “catch” me by snapping their fingers quickly to see if I notice the movement. It’s equivalent to “Look at me! Gotcha!”

I wonder why people want to catch us. What’s in it for them?

When I trained in Orientation and Mobility, I learned that “blindness” encompasses a whole continuum of varying degrees of sight to no sight. A lot of people are visually-impaired and no one even knows their struggle because they have enough vision to get around without a cane or a guide dog. But the struggle is real.

Yes, some people can make eye contact. Some can’t.

Some can look you straight in the eye one moment then turn around and spill a large glass of water the next. There’s a gap in their peripheral, or side, vision. Some can see where you’re standing, but not your hands. So you go to shake a hand and the person stands there unaware. “What a snob,” the thought is. Another gap.

In Erie, Pennsylvania, where I live, there are about 290,000 citizens. 15 % of those people are legally blind. That means there are about 43,500 people who cannot see what a typical person should be able to see. That’s a lot of people!

I never minded people thinking I was clumsy or air-headed. It was an easy blame. It was much harder to admit I couldn’t see. Maybe you know someone who is having some struggles. Maybe it’s his or her vision. Be kind. And if you see someone with a cane, don’t “test” them. Don’t “wonder.” It’s hard to pick up a cane, believe me.  If I wanted attention or a free bus pass, I could solve that in other ways.

Today’s truth: blindness is a continuum with a large span between legally blind and completely blind. There is no one look to being blind. – you can tweet this.

Do you know anyone who is visually-impaired or blind? If you could ask them one question about their vision, what would it be?

Amy3-4Bio

Amy Bovaird is an educator, an inspirational speaker and author of the bestselling memoir, Mobility Matters: Stepping Out in Faith. Although Amy suffers from a dual —progressive vision and hearing loss—she continues to enjoy running, hiking and traveling. She also supports local and national animal rescue organizations. Amy blogs about international travel and the challenges she faces as she loses more vision and hearing. But more importantly, she shares the lessons God reveals to her through her difficulties. You can read about her experiences at http://amybovaird.com
Other ways to connect with Amy:

Facebook page

Author Facebook page

Amazon kindle, paperback and Large Print

Signed copy of book

Audio sample (book coming soon!)

Wizard of What?

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Yellow lab, Roja, wearing a furry lion’s mane.
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Husband Ben dressed as Scarecrow, Joy in tin woman costume with guide dog Roja, dressed as cowardly lion, standing next to Elli, age 5, dressed as Glinda, and Lucy, age 9, as Dorothy.
So I was just starting to really like this Joy person.  Sure, she’s a bit chatty and won’t stop commanding that phone of hers to do different things, but she plays tug-of-war like a real champ and even lets me win sometimes.  And her kids are awesome…they let me snuggle with them as they fall asleep, and whenever Joy says it’s time to get them from school, I race to the front door to put my harness on!  But Halloween really made me question the entire Thomas family, even Joy’s chill hipster husband with the big beard.

They put this furry lion’s mane on me, and as if that weren’t embarrassing enough, they added this badge labeled “courage.” Then they all got in weird costumes too.  After getting all gussied up, they took me to this dog parade where there were tons of dogs and treats, but they had the nerve to expect me not to sniff around!  I figured it was payback time for the mane, so I barely listened to a word they said.  I’ll teach Joy not to pawn her strange human traditions off on me!  I’m a serious working dog, after all.  I can’t be bothered with this hullabaloo.

I saw Joy pack up all the costumes yesterday, though, so I’m thinking this was just a one time thing.  I’ll let it slide this time, especially since she took me to Chicago yesterday to hang out with some fellow working dogs.  I got to see Anja, who I used to play with when I lived in California.  We pawed each other like we were small pups and then snuggled next to each other in our harnesses on the floor of some taco joint they took us to.   I also got to meet a new friend named Cabrillo, and he was super friendly.

All in all, I still think Joy is a decent handler, so I think I’ll keep working for her.  Plus, she just got these new lamb treats that I really can’t pass up.  You should see the drool that hangs from my mouth when I catch a glimpse of these things!

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Jane, Joy and Pam, with guide dogs Anja, Roja and Cabrillo.

Who Let the Dog Out?

Hi there!  Joy is finally letting me, Roja the guide dog, speak for myself!  Joy brought me to school for the first time last week, twice!  Last Thursday, I showed off my skills in Mrs. Cardiff’s class at Nicholson Elementary in Montgomery, IL, and I’d like to give a special shout-out to those 3rd graders because they were awesome!  Every time Joy asked a question, those kids’ hands went up, and after they answered, Joy let them pet me!  And some of them even got to feed me a treat!  I sat there with my harness on, acting all calm and chill, but inside I was like “WOO HOO!  SCHOOL ROCKS! I LOVE KIDS AND TREATS AND DROOLING!!!”  Don’t worry, though, I totally played cool, and besides a bit of drool, I’m pretty sure I convinced those kids that I’m the most gentle, obedient dog ever!

Then the next day, I got to go to my very own family member, Lucy’s, 4th grade class in Naperville, IL.  Her teacher, Mrs. Fawell, was so nice, and the kids huddled around me, asking all sorts of interesting questions about me.  I just got to sit and enjoy the attention, as shown in the picture below.  Joy did most of the talking…boy can she yap…blah blah blah blah blah…but I got to show off my guide dog work when the kids made an aisle for me to guide Joy down, complete with a chair obstacle and all!  I’m not trying to brag, but I was pretty much the bomb-diggity guide dog of the year, and those kids loved me!  They stared at me and petted me and applauded for me.  But don’t worry — again, I played the cool card and didn’t get all crazy, even when Joy took off my harness and played tug with me.  I did wag my tail, but that was only because I wanted all the kids to know I was happy to meet them!  Thanks, children!  I can’t wait for my next adventure!
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How I Told My Workplace About My Low Vision (A Guest Post by Jen Walker)

If you read Jen’s guest post yesterday, “Should I Tell My Workplace I’m Losing My Eyesight?,”  then you are probably curious HOW she did it.  Here’s her story!  

Here is a play by play of how my ‘coming out’ went. At my current school, with my current boss, I started missing handshakes, people handing me things, I couldn’t keep up with looking at kid’s data in small print….and I couldn’t come up with any more excuses as to why my dad was driving me to work at age 30! Continue reading “How I Told My Workplace About My Low Vision (A Guest Post by Jen Walker)”

Should I Tell My Workplace I’m Losing My Eyesight? (A Guest Post by Jen Walker)

I’m so excited to introduce you to our friend, Jen.  She has been reading our blog for awhile now, and we’ve been chatting about our lives as young moms with RP for a couple years.  We are also part of the same online community of visually impaired women on Facebook, called Room With a View, and Jen is always posting the most thought-provoking questions, like the one she shares here today. It’s one I wish I’d read back when I was teaching and constantly afraid I’d lose my job because of my vision.  I know Jen’s post will be an encouragement for many out there in the workplace!   Continue reading “Should I Tell My Workplace I’m Losing My Eyesight? (A Guest Post by Jen Walker)”

DoubleVisionBlog Fight Song

View and share “DoubleVisionBlog Fight Song” Video on Facebook

Hi DoubleVisionBlog friends! I’ve been secretly working on this video for the past month as a surprise for Jenelle. Happy Blindness Awareness Month!

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In honor of Blindness Awareness month this October, Joy shares her journey of shame, vulnerability and courage. With both humor and insight, Joy and her twin sister, Jenelle, share their stories of life with RP at doublevisionblog.com. Continue reading “DoubleVisionBlog Fight Song”

The Middle of Our Stories

Jenelle started me thinking about stories with her post last week. Awhile back I wrote a post that I was too embarrassed to publish, due to the vulnerability involved in sharing my lack of confidence at the time.  In light of the confidence I’ve gained in recent months, I’d like to share it here now, with some new insights.

I can see her.

Confident. Calm. Kind. Self-assured. Unassuming. Strong. Inviting. Gracious. Intelligent. Witty. Playful. Peaceful. Attractive. Insightful. Carefree.

She’s standing on the corner, cane in hand, waiting to cross, and she looks like she knows where she’s going. She’s approachable and aware. She accepts people the way she has accepted herself, fully. There is a lightness in her footsteps because she doesn’t take herself too seriously. She sees life as an adventure and not an emergency.

Continue reading “The Middle of Our Stories”

What Does It Mean to Be Present?

My Aunt Debbie came over the other day and gave my girls the best present, a picture book entitled, What Does it Mean to Be Present?. It’s a beautiful book in a whimsical font on a topic that I haven’t seen many children’s books tackle. Lots of books on friendship and sharing and learning. But not many on “being”.

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My daughters love this book, although I’m the one who can’t stop flipping through it, hoping it will rub off on me. My mind being the hamster wheel that it is, I really struggle with being fully present. Continue reading “What Does It Mean to Be Present?”

From On Top of the World to Reality: Transition Home

Roja's puppy raisers, Jack and Linda, have raised 38 puppies and gave me the gift of Roja.
Roja’s puppy raisers, Jack and Linda, co-raised Roja with the Swart family. Puppy raising is a selfless act, and I’m grateful to them for their care of Roja as a puppy.
Graduation from Guide Dogs for the Blind seems like eons ago, though the interactions with Roja’s amazing puppy raisers that day are still clearly etched in my mind. In fact, the entire day felt magical, from the after effects of the shock of my sisters surprising me  to eating mouth-watering Indian food with friends who drove 14 hours in one day to celebrate with me and Roja.

Roja relaxing on my lap while driving through Golden Gate Park Continue reading “From On Top of the World to Reality: Transition Home”